#i just add to the crack

[is-this-even-relatable]

Misfortune Teller

tldr: An older Danny, apprentice to Clockwork, does a lot of field work across dimensions, resetting the timeline, queuing future events, and who knows what else. Occasionally, he warns people about such upcoming possibilities, to set them on the right path. How, you might ask? Well in this case... as a wandering fortune teller.

Crack-fic (oh god, it's getting long and my logic brain won't let it remain as crack) where Danny becomes Clockwork's apprentice after getting his GED. Living his infinite afterlife to the fullest. Inspired by this tumblr post.

Working for Clockwork had been... interesting so far. At first, Danny got frustrated by how vague and cryptic Clockwork was. He'd just shunt Danny off to some ancient time with a few words, his own time medallion (Danny carried it everywhere with him now), and then pop back into the portal, leaving Danny with only the faintest idea of where to go.

Eventually, after enough time (ha!) spent around Clockwork, Danny figured out that it just basically meant that he had free reign and to do whatever he wanted. Because if he went on the wrong path, (like that one time in Pompeii when he had almost caused the volcano to explode a few years too early), Clockwork would just pop on by, say another few cryptic words, and then it'd all be fine and dandy, or as he liked to say, "All is as it should be... Now stop practicing your wail by an active volcano."

After telling Jazz about that (it was supposed to be funny, not concerning), she just sighed and shook her head, with a forlorn "think before you act, Danny!" but hey, it'd turned out fine so far, so who cares how he does what Clockwork asks him to do, as long as it gets done, right? Even if it's with a liiiiitle more mischief than strictly required.

Besides. Danny was the one who had been doing time shenanigans across millennia, not Jazz. And he thought he'd been getting pretty good at it too! He'd actually started giving himself a different made-up background for each universe he visited. Sam and Tucker were helping him keep up with the identities on a spreadsheet, so if he had to go back to one he'd already visited, he'd remember who he'd said he was supposed to be.

---

He was on a call with them one evening while haunting Jazz's apartment, doing just that, when he felt a familiar tingle in the back of his throat, as well as a heightened awareness of the seconds passing by, that always accompanied his mentor's appearance.

Sam was talking about his past stint posing as a god of death when he cut in. "Hey- sorry to interrupt, Sam- Clocky's here, guys, I gotta dip."

"Aw, come on! We hardly talked any this past week since you passed your certifications, man," Tucker complained.

Danny rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. "Yeah, yeah. Partly on you too though, you've been caught up outside of class, and Sam's schedule is nearly the opposite of yours."

Sam hummed in agreement despiter Tucker's scoff.

Danny missed hanging out with them as much as they had in high school, but hey, life goes on. Or at least, theirs did, to college. After finally flunking out of Casper High, he'd taken some time to get used to his responsibilities in the ghost zone, and when he had, he realized that he didn't really have much enthusiasm or timeleft for his human life.

And he didn't really want to go back home either.

But Jazz had made him tie up any loose ends before he noped-off to god knows where, which frankly, he had to thank her for. Getting his GED took a few years, but it was an accomplishment that could be attributed to Danny Fenton, no ghostliness required. Then he was able to let that tether go free.

Pulled out of his musings by a few more grumbles from Tucker, Danny said his goodbyes, promising to call the next time they were all available.

After hanging up, Danny swiveled around, anticipation already lighting up his eyes an ethereal green.

Clockwork, for his part, had been waiting patiently through Danny's lengthy goodbyes. Although he supposed that it tracked for the watcher of time to be patient. With his job, it'd be a nightmare if he wasn't.

"Phantom," Clockwork spoke, calm as always. "I have some tasks I need you to complete as my apprentice."

And Danny, always ready for adventure, didn't need him to explain any further. "Sure! When do you need me to be?"

Clockwork smiled at that. "I am fortunate you are eager. Follow me."

---

Danny popped into existence in this universe with a burst of cold air and static electricity. He found himself hovering by a clocktower above a sprawling, gothic city. Smog and light pollution obscured the stars above him, to his disappointment. He comforted himself with the fact that he'd probably have all the time he wanted to fly someplace less populated to see them later.

He started off by familiarizing himself with the city. As he flew, he followed the trail of power and met the resident city-spirit, a spooky- but kind underneath- woman draped in black lace, who told him her name was Gotham. He spoke in length with her about this universe, its heroes, and her knights. On that, she was very enthusiastic... or at least Danny thought she was, her projected emotions belaying much more than her gloomy exterior. She told him how her knights had been through a lot and would need some guidance fighting the darkness that pooled in her deepest corners, smiling with too much glee, filling lungs with fear, and terrorizing with cold hard bullets.

Danny could sense that the dangers she spoke of were growing in power, ever slowly. The longer they shadowed people's minds and hearts, an intangible thing grew that lent them more otherworldly pull than their physical forms had right to hold.

That must be what he was sent here for.

But... they were weak, pitifully so for him, infinite king as he was. And besides, he wasn't here in that sense. He was a messenger, a simple apprentice. And he could do this however he wanted.

Cue his talk with Lady Gotham, and subsequent idea to arm her knights. With what? Well, he figured knowledge would be a start. Flying high above the city invisibly, Danny noticed a sea of colors and lights by what appeared to be the city's pier. He flew down, noting that it appeared to be the setup spot for a travelling circus or carnival of some kind.

He considered what to do. One of Lady Gotham's troubles was a madman clown, right? Well maybe he'd be attracted to his ilk here... and with the danger came the knights. Maybe he could catch one of them here?

Danny was floating around at the entrance and beginning to formulate a plan when a flyer caught his eye. Looking for a mystic to read fortunes. URGENT!

Hadn't Clockwork said something about fortunes? And he hadn't made an identity in this universe yet...

A mischievous smile crept across Danny's face, splitting it in two with far too many teeth.

---

Half a city away, a man in all black, perched on the very same clocktower that Phantom had Appeared by, shivered as he felt an ominous premonition about his sanity in the near future...

Said man quickly opened his comms to check in with his many, many kids. Yet even after hearing back from each, he still felt apprehensive.

Somewhere even further, Clockwork laughed.

---

And that's how Danny found himself seated at a fortune teller's booth at a pier in Gotham, two days later, for the Tricksy Traveling Circus's grand opening.

[chaosinplural]

i feel like the tragedy of being aroace is that i’m never going to be anyone’s favorite person. like at some point everyone’s favorite person is going to be whoever they have sex with and kiss and i’m never going to want that. hell i don’t even have a best friend now but even if i do i’ll still be second to their boyfriend or girlfriend or husband because that’s how the world works

[tonydaddingham]

david tennant improv comedy debut featuring hits such as

"there's that fucking leprechaun!!!"

"swill and spit! swill and spit!"

*air guitar on the ground whilst singing vague rock opera*

*singing Actual Opera*

(dirty) "bitch"

and so much more!!!!!!!

[chuluoyi]

okay so I have an idea.. Gojo cuddling with his pregnant partner while watching a movie and him laying his head on your belly??(and omg, what if the baby kicks, and he feels it) the image is so cute I'm dyingggggg (also this is NOT a request, just an idea/suggestion <3)

he’s so doing this!!🥹 he’s in love with you more than ever now that you have his baby inside you and as a bonus, your baby bump shows that you’re his and his only—he’s so damn proud of that ngl 💁🏻‍♀️ and so having his head on your belly or roaming his hands on it pretty much has become a part of your daily checklist.

being the silly man he is, he’s trying all sort of shenanigans to get his baby to notice him—

“why isn’t he kicking?” he pressed his head on your belly with a frown, tickling your skin with his hair. you sighed.

“he’s been kicking and turning my insides all day and now might be just tired. and i’m tired too, satoru… i wanna sleep…”

“wait! waaait!”

suddenly he poked your belly button and you winced.

“don’t poke me please😭”

“but! he isn’t responding! this is one way to wake him up and make him kick me!”

yeah, even as a fetus inside you, your baby wasn’t amused with his father’s antics, as he would calm down and not kick as much whenever he’s near.

— bonus:

as a last ditch attempt, he suddenly had his index finger poke into the space between your legs and lodged it inside. the action made you jolt and with it was a hard kick to your stomach.

“yay!! he kicks me!”

safe to say he was the one being kicked next 🫡

[landedinpayne]

in case you are in the mood to feel devastated here’s an alternate way of viewing charles’ response to edwin’s confession:

we know that charles kinda puts edwin on a pedestal- yes they are partners but there is a bit of a hierarchy between them. charles just looks up to and admires edwin in so many ways while constantly looking down on and being really hard on himself. he puts on his big happy persona because he thinks that people wouldn’t like him if they actually got to know him.

so when edwin confesses, it’s like a blow to him. he took his charming persona too far and went and tricked the most important person in the world into thinking he was worthy of love. and it’s worse because he does love edwin in that way, which is exactly why he can’t let him know that. charles still believes that he is like his dad, and he saw exactly what his parents’ relationship did to his mother.

he thinks that loving edwin in the way that he wants to would only cause more pain to this boy who has already been through far more than he deserves. so he blinks back his tears, attempts the same charming smile he’s used all these years, and dishes out the gentlest non-rejection in the history of forever

[mvdsart]

Nothing living leaves the Burial Mounds.

[urban-shade]

i may or may not make this a full iceberg video later but i thought it would be funny to make a pressure iceberg image

[necrotic-nephilim]

Damian: So, is this thing between Drake and Todd supposed to be a secret?

Stephanie: Hardly. The only people who don't know that Jason loves Tim is.. well, Jason and Tim.

cackling over this. i think this *is* a conversation that 100% would happen. i love the idea that Tim and Jason are so obvious that they've somehow broken the scale and everyone can tell *but* them. they're just so wrapped up in each other that they're incapable of seeing the bigger picture. the minute they're in the same room all rational thought goes out the window. also think that's why it takes them so long to realize and confess feelings, bc they're in so deep with this rivalry that's taking over their life they just don't notice.

but everyone else does. bc well. Jason's eyes follow Tim around the room, and Tim always seems to inexplicably know what Jasson is up to, even when he's off the grid. they run into each other on patrols, they find reasons to bust each other's attempted missions for arbitrary reasons. if Tim has a visible bruise, either it's from Jason, or Jason has kicked the shit out of the guy who did it. they're loudly possessive of each other, where Tim gets *very* huffy if Bruce assigns someone else to deal with Red Hood and Jason does Not like other ppl flirting with Tim.

Damian and Steph probably gossip about it. there might be a betting pool about it. they have to make some kind of a game out of it so Jason and Tim don't drive everyone else *mad* with their unhinged courting behavior. if they don't laugh they will scream and lock the two of them in a room until they make out. which Steph is still arguing they should do. one day she'll convince everyone she's right.

[takescrackseriously]

Will + Won't

Based on the au by @itzkawaiiduh and @k3yboi

Loved this au and loved how scary Eva's art is.

Working on doing more horror art, but I'm still getting the hang of it.

Also, funfact: This is one of my older WIPs.

[casualavocados]

...Nothing.

Chen Bowen as CHEN YI & Chiang Tien as AI DI KISEKI: DEAR TO ME (2023)

[thetwelfthcrow]

Another angle of our very rare interactions

https://x.com/sim3744/status/1858361404191035619

RAAWWWRRRGGRGRGRGG that fucking AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH

AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

[misfithive]

Simon as Buttercup Pt. 1

Boba eyes

Smol

Angy

😊smiley

jag vill ha mina pengar!!!!!!

[ihavesomejays]

pumped this out for a homie in an hour this morning

this scene is from this fic by alicura and omg it has me in a chokehold

[musclesandhammering]

There’s zero chance Loki and Hela having so many similarities is just a coincidence. And even though we’re most definitely never getting a full explanation for it, I’m so curious as to what you guys believe the reason is. Do you think:

a.) Loki’s a shapeshifter who can see people’s memories when he touches them. So when Odin picked him up as a baby, he saw Hela in Odin’s mind and shifted himself to resemble her.

b.) Loki and Hela have the same biological mother.

c.) Hela is Loki’s biological mother.

d.) Odin changed Loki to look like Hela when he first held him, because he missed her.

e.) Hela’s biological mother is jotun, and she and Loki both have black hair/pale skin/green aesthetic/etc because that’s just what frost giants look like when they take an asgardian form.

f.) Hela and Loki are both adopted, both children of Laufey. Odin took Hela centuries earlier, then when he realised Laufey’d had another child, he took Loki too.

**I’ve listed these in order from the ones I find most likely to least likely, if you’re curious. Tell me which headcanon you prefer, I wanna see.

[suguruuuuu-chan]

Do you ever think about the fact that the ONE time Sanji let himself be comfortable and enjoy dresses and makeup with cigarettes, Ace died and Luffy almost died all alone and so far away. Will Sanji ever forgive himself for daring to relax and explore himself a bit while catastrophic things were happening? (Jk he'll never do so again, just in case)

[gwendolynnderolo]

teen wolf memes part 14: we’re back again bitches

we’ve made almost 140 of these what is wrong with us. shout out to @burnthatbridgewhenwecometoit for being the best i couldn’t do this without you

teen wolf memes part 14